Monday, November 24, 2008

This Thing Called Love....

I have been wondering... what is this thing called love that always never seem to stop making me feel miserable?

As hard as i would like to be strong and be tough bout it... I will somehow go emoish and sad about it...

I am a very indecisive person... I dont even know what i want from this thing called love...

Every single new relationship i have, i thought i have found love... But apparently, after everything ends, i realise it wasnt love at all...

I keep on thinking... Why can some other girls be so contented by just marrying someone they love but have no goals in life to achieve? Do they really feel so contented by just marrying someone who earns less than 5 figures a month and they themselves only earm RM3k per month? How can people like them feel contented?

As much as i love those fairy tale love stories... As much as i would like to be able to find someone i love in a very fated way, i dont think i will feel contented living life that always have to watch my budget so tightly...

To me the world today is very realistic.. Love does not work just by love anymore... I feel, in order to make love work... everything else have to work... Like trust, commitment, financially and the social circle...

I have a friend who is recently registered... In fact i already have quite alot of girls friends who is married already.... They all seem to be so contented by just marrying someone n be a housewife... I dont think i can do that..

I have heard many stories how so n so got marry to so n so... Some of those women even resorted to getting pregnant on purpose so that they can make their bf stay n got married to her... Sigghh... I simply pity girls like that and to be honest, i really look down on girls like that... Destroying your life just to make someone that dont love you anymore to be stuck on to you... Im not saying that having a baby means destroying life... Im just saying its so not worth it to do so...

Some even purposely find a rich bf... then purposely pregnant so that they can fulfill their dreams of marrying a rich husband.... Sigghh....

Whatever happens to girl power? What ever happens to girls are able to take care of themselves... Whatever happens to gender equality? Ok, strength wise, we girls can never win guys... But making money wise, we can always fight for it... Do we really need to depend on husband to feed us? Do we really need rich husbands so that we dont have to work anymore? This sounds more of like a damn useless woman to me...

Oh, n dont start flaming that im jealous cause i cant find rich bfs... =_=""" Those of you who knows me well enough would know why i dont necessarily need a rich bfs...

Im just saying, its not wrong to have a rich husband to spoil u for this n that... but its just so wrong to totally depend on them? Ever think of future wise if ur marriage went wrong? You cant divorce cause u got too dependent on them... They will step on you upside down cause they can control you with their money... Come on man... Your financial have been control by your parents when u were little until u finish studies.. then when u get married, takan u wan ur husband to step on you with his money forever?

Aiya.. change topic...

Why would a girl let herself down by being in a relationship that sounds so wrong? Im in this category all the time... When i first started a relationship with someone, i know it feels wrong... i know there is no future together... but i still bloody hell love to digg the hell hole n went into it... sighhh... Then end up feeling like shit... I always end up with someone that i know i have no ending with.. but i still love that person very much regardless...

But i do have friends or guys friends which i think we both are very matching in career wise, thoughts, opinions and goals in life... But i never seem to be able to have the love feeling towards them.. cause thats probably we've been friends too long... So we end up being best friends... My close guys friends are very compatible with me in thinking wise, but i have no feelings at all towards them...

My love life havent been perfect though...

Bf One - I thought i could spend the rest of my life with him... even all fortune tellers and our horoscopes are very matching... He taught me alot... We might have even got married this year... But the problem is that, he likes to lie... Just have to lie for no reason... And he is not making enough for me to feel contented... And so not hard working at all..... very hot tempered... i had 5 hell years with him... full of traumatic experience of fucking mind games and temper... So i knew i have to get out soon enough to save myself..

another BF - He taught me how to loosen up... things dont have to be serious all the time... He never fail to cheer me up when i was down... He was younger than me.. i nvr did appreciate him at all cause i'll go crazy cause i was fucked up from previous relationship that i turned into someone very hot tempered.. But he loves me enough to be stuck with me for almost 2 years....

Then i stayed single for a while... along the way, i met people which i thought i could possibly have a relationship with... but they all ended up making me feel hurt... which i believe it is karma... im still serving my karma till today by the way....

Men 1 - He is so indesicove of wat he wants... he is torn between loving me or his ex gf of 7 years which is obvious cannot be saved anymore... Which he ended up choosing n being with another different girl who is a crazy freaky possesive woman... but he still loves her alot regardless...

Men 2 - We were very sweet together... i was happy being with him... we could click really well n talk really well with each other.. we were all sweet, honey n roses... just suddenly one fine day... he refuse to talk to me anymore.. Its like yesterday we were like i miss u, good night sweetie... muax muax... the next day, when i tried calling, he no longer pick up my phone... his excuse was a damn lame wan... which i dont buy the excuse he gives me n i still dont know what i did wrong till today...

Men 3 - He is the type of guy my parents would love for me to have... If we were to end up being together, i think n believe, we would have a very bright future building career together... Everything is fine about him.. except that sometimes he loves to talk really lame stuff... *swt* *swt* but unfortunately... He has a gf of 10 years... Logically thinking, common sense for normal people... people would rather him choose the 10 years gf than me, the girl he only known for 6 months... Even though i do like him... but i know for sure, there is no future together... As i know, he owe alot to his gf... His achievement in his life... all owed to his gf of 10 years that have helped him alot along the way... But what have i done for him? Seee... sigghh...

Im always in such sticky sad situation that will nvr work for me... sighhh... when will my "The One" appear in my life? I starting to lose hope that there is ever the one for me...

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Homeless by Leona Lewis

Waiting here
For you to call me
For you to tell me
That everything's a big mistake

Waiting here
In this rainfall
Feeling so small
This dream was not suppose to break

I'm so sorry now
For the pain I caused you
Wont you please forgive
Please

But you don't love me anymore
You don't want me anymore
There's a sign on your door
No vacancy, just emptiness
Without your love
I'm homeless

In this cold
I'm walking aimless
Feeling helpless
Without a shelter from the storm

In my heart
I miss you so much
Missing your touch
And the bed that used to be so warm

I'm so sorry now
For the pain I caused you
Wont you please forgive
Please

But you don't love me anymore
You don't want me anymore
There's a sign on your door
No vacancy, just emptiness
Without your love
I'm homeless

My, My baby
I'm sorry
Oooh

But you don't love me anymore
You don't want me anymore
There's a sign on your door
No vacancy, just emptiness
Without your love
I'm homeless

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Nokia Nuffnang Silent Halloween Rocks!

Why it rocks???

First off, I met hell alot of ghosts that night... Some were of course pretty ghosts, scary ghosts, ugly, barely unrecognizable, weird looking, funny looking.... alot of nonsense...

As i was having bimbotic moment that time, i of course decided to go as pretty ghost... I was actually planning to go there as a sexy devil... i mean real sexayyyyyyy.... but last minute decided not to... cause i thought there might be hell lots of devils already....

So i went as Marilyn Monroe... with my own real mole... My mole is almost exactly the same side as Marilyn Monroe's mole ok!!!

Someone thought it was a fake mole... *swt* *swt*

Ohh... I met loads of ghosts while registering outside...

And i especially cannot recognise Michael Jackson at all!!! Cause this Michael Jackson was standing right in front of me, smiling.. and i was like.. who the toot is this? It took me a few seconds to register who is that until i saw the name tag! *swt* *swt*... Seriously couldnt recall that Michael Jackson was that chubby... HAhahhahaaha!


Notice the pic above, it was taken when Michael Jackson was smiling at me and i was still so blur to realise that it was Kenny!

After registering, I went inside and saw the crowd...

Fuhh... everyone fully dressed n seriously dressed!!



I met new ghost friends... eventhough some of them are not officially dead yet... lol... but they will be soon... muahahhahaa....


I saw my twin... Another Marilyn Monroe but this one is the future me with white freaking long hair....


A so called vampire who has grey hair...


My best friend from hell, the Fallen Angel... That doesnt look that fallen cause we were busy giving kisses all around... muahahaha....


The Jabbawockeez...


Kurt Cobain... which at first impression, i thought Kurt Cobain was wearing pyjamas...


Then a scarier version for Kurt Cobain... which i was really supporting him to win the Best Dressed for the night...


This is how the future Michael Jackson would look like...


And Michael's pretty french maid!


Dr. Evil... who actually isnt that evil in real life... but that dolly sure looks scary n evil to me... i hate dolls like that!


Oh, n i almost got strangled by a mummy... which u can see, i was willing to let the mummy strangle me... ahhahaa... im a sicko, i know... lol...


And hey look! I even spotted A milk carton that contains Melamine! How cool!!! See.. i love milk with melamine that im kissing it!! *we r dead anyways, so why worry about melamine?* hahhahahaa....


And loads more weirdos along the way... lazy to elaborate one by one adi... muahahahaa....

The best highlight of the night were actually game playing...


First was me being wrapped up as a mummy with my group...
I tell u.. it was damn hard to breath through the toilet papers ok! I felt like i was going to die the second time! *as in Marilyn Monroe's point of view la!*

Then this second game we play.. fuh!! This is a tiring killer game to me!


Being a kiasu me... Marilyn has to be a very damn kiasu woman ok!... We r suppose to protect the balloon provided to us till death do us part! and of course, the last one to have their balloon not burst, will win RM100!!!

So at the beginning of the game, i was running around happily n easily bursting people's balloon with my sharp nails... and then... and then... i burst the wrong balloon... the damn owner of that damn balloon came chasing me all the wayyy.... i went left, he went left, i ran right, he ran right with me.. his main target is to just burst my balloon... *ooppss, i dont think that sound right* but anyways... yeah.. he leave me no choice but to hide my balloon under my dress....


And i ended up like this... And this joker doctor is the guy that was chasing me all around la... damn u... hahahahaa...


10 to 15 mins later... he is still beside me... so i had to crouch so hard... protecting my balloon with the toilet papers that were left on the floor from the previous game.... and his hands is still trying to burst my balloon... luckily im a girl.. ahhahaa... cause he wouldnt dare to simply touch me... or elseee.... or elseee!! I would have yelled out and framed him for molesting me... ahahahaha.... *just joking k!*

But bugger... so kiasu also no use.. cause i did not win...


This bugger wins the RM100.... cause he is the tallest ghost around... no one can ever reach his balloon man...

After all the tiring but extremely fun game.. we ghost started to feel hungry... and right before we wanted to kill each other to eat eachother up, we were served good food...


Ghost can hungry also wan k.... See all the ghost n weirdos lining up for food...


And we ghost even eat together.... Hehehehe... *nvm me there, i dont know wat i was doing that time* :D :D :D

After eating... the highlight of the night is finally here... silent dance!


Can u see me grooving with the music in my ear phone.... *awww... i miss my phone... I lost my phone!!! GRRRRRR.... *

It really felt weird at first dancing with ear phone and knowing its all quiet n etc on the outside... dont know how to explain la.. but it feel really damn weird k...

In between the party, there were live band performing... such as the Alaling and the Kaya Koks (weird name), Dose 2, and another band that performed last... (forgotten their name).... they were not bad to some people... and some people loves it... But to be honest, their music is not really my taste... so i dont have much comment about it.... *have to be honest la, everything puji puji, then this entry will sound fake right?* HAhahahaa....

There were a total of 9 Nokia XpressMusic phones were given out as prizes that night ok!!! 9!! Jio.. Kau!! Sembilan! Nine!! Fuhh... and i got none from that night... *swt* *swt*... i only got the door gift, which i especially likey... RED COLORED NOKIA WRISTBAND 2GB THUMB DRIVE!!! RED OK!!! RED!! N 2GB somemore!!! fuhhh!!! Luckily i did not lose it along when i got robbed the other day, cause i was carrying that thumb drive with me the day before i got robbed...

Let me quote this from the Nuffnang blog site... "The Nuffnang Nokia Silent Halloween was no doubt one of our best events which we had great time putting it together thanks to the support of Nokia and our partners MEDIACOM, JWT and Text100." Which i totally agreed!!! This time the prizes given were so genorous n alot... 9 mobile phones were given away! How many of u all have attended an event that gives 9 mobile phones in one go ha???? None so far right??? HAhahhaa...

I hope i can win the N96?? Can arr..? Can this blog entry deserve a winning? I just lost my mobile phone in a stupid incident.... I really hope to win the mobile phone? Can? Yes? No?

To show u how much i really want the phone...


See, i am even willing to stick my tongue into a bodyless, disgusting head... LOL!!!

But however... to be honest, i really enjoyed that night... and those who didnt go n lose out your chance to go that night... i can give u 2 words!! Your Lost!! *and u know who u r!* hahahahaaa.... ;P

Anyways... I heart Nuffnang for giving me wonderful n interesting life.... *arent i such a boot licker ay?* muahahahahhaa.....

Monday, November 10, 2008

Madagascar 2 - Escape to Africa!

"I like to move it, move it...
You like to move it, move it...
We like to move it, move it... MOVE IT!!"




Thanks to Nuffnang and United International Pictures Malaysia, i was invited to watch the Premier Screening of Madagascar 2 - Escape to Africa!

The movie was superb! But although most people says that the first Madagascar is better than this second one, I still think this second one is still nice, hilariously funny and i really needed the laughter after all i've been through for the past months of nonsense!

Warning: May contain spoilers ahead...




This time, this movie focus more on the chracter's homeland, where they supposingly belong... they showed how Alex the lion end up in the New York Zoo ever since he was a cub lion...

So the whole movie started off with the New Yorkers get on that plane in Madagascar to take off to New York but their plane crash into Africa... Like what you see in the preview...



Take note though... The character of baby/cub Alex is actually the voice of Ben Stiller's son! (FYI, Ben Stiller is the voice for Alex; for those of you who didnt know!)... So take note while watching it ya! I didnt know it when i was watching the movie till i read their production notes (which is like 50 pages long ok!)

Will.i.am is the voice for the character Moto Moto... Wanna know who is Moto Moto? Go watch the movie!!!



I guess thats all i want to say... go watch this movie... it really worth it to watch it especially if u r all stessed up about life... (yes, i hate my life atm!)



I would rate this movie 4 out of 5!



Yeah... I like to move it move it...

Tralalallaaaa.... back to sucky sulking life!

Thursday, November 06, 2008

updates??

i know i know im suppose to like update on many many things... i know im suppose to write about my Kuching trip.. I know im suppose to write about Nokia Nuffnang Silent Halloween Party... Somemore i need to review about Madagascar... Oh, didnt i tell u that i went to watch the premier screening of Madagascar 2 yesterday night? Thanks to Nuffnang i got the prmier screening... it is still very very funny.. hilarious n all.. but most people says the first Madagascar is still funnier than this seond one...

Sorry sorry... really been busy! And im going off to somewhere tomolo night until Sunday night.. which i will tell u about it when i come back... been very busy... and hor... Im especially busy today!!

Fark!! My car, front passenger window got smashed and my handbag was stolen!!! Like seriously wtf wtf wtf wtf!!! My most precious is my purse and my handphone... Sighh.. gone my Gucci purse!!! So i have spent the whole day cancelling my credit cards, my handphone, make police report... watever fucking thing that u need to do when u lost ur handbag la... Then went to fix back my car window at Toyota Service center... got it by 6pm... somemore in the process of go collecting new credit cards and new atm cards! Tomolo still need to go activate back my Maxis line, change houselocks n etc etc.... FUCKING TROUBLESOME OK!!!!



How did it happen? I was at Bangsar area... working.. as in inspection some double storey terrace house around that area... I was merely like 10 feet away from my car... I stupidly left my handbag in the car, cause i thought... since my car is within my eye sight and im inspecting the damn house by the road side... So i was afraid someone might snatch my handbag while i was standing by the road side.. so i leave my hand bag in my car... Little do i know, both ways also die la... If i were to carry it with me and got snatch from me itself will prolly be worse than the damn low life mother fucker thief smashing my car window... cause u know never know... i might prolly be dragged a few metres before i can finally let go off my bag (knowing the fighting spirit in me...)... So yeah.. this is how it happened!

When i was so into looking at the house, i was behind some truck (not shown in the pic below), i heard my car alarm went off... My first thought.. "FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!!! ARRGGHHH!!!" I ran with my high heels as fast as i could only to see my car window smashed! I did not see anything nor hear anything cause i was only concentrating on.. "Must faster run to car! Run! Run! Run!" So i see no shit! But some passerby said they saw a motorbike speed off with 2 person on it... Haihhh...



Wasted extra RM190 to fix my damn window... (as if im not broke enough)


That idiot must have used hammer or something... Impossible that hole is made by helmet! And i tinted safety tint on my car window ok!! Also blardy no use! Now i can see the usefulness of the safety tint! @$##$@%@&#$@

First reaction when i first saw my window smashed: Shocked, speechless...
Next reaction when i realised i lost all my phones n contacts: I yelled!! And throw all my files, pen n my camera around (cause i was carrying them to do house inspection)... Then i thought.. nvm... go to public phone n call ppl...

3rd reaction when i realised i dont even have money to call: I cried n yell... until everybody that passes by came n look n asked me wat happened which i didnt bother to answer... Just stood there crying n n yelling hysterically...

Then i borrowed someone's handphone to make phone call... 4th reaction: stunned again, wondering who to call cause i cant remember anyone's number in kl n i have no bf to call! Haihhh... cried more.... Try to calm down adi, then i called my office and asked a collegue to come help me... Haih... Being single at this kind of moment sucks!

While waiting for collegue to arrive, continue crying... mid way crying, i felt the urge to smoke.. wanted to look for cigs... then remembered... fuck! got stolen as well!! KNN!!! A lot of feelings, emotions n reactions involved in this process wei... tiring sial...

Haih... bad luck like shitttt.... I curse the mutherfuker that stole my handbag till death that he will just die in a horrible accident or maybe not die.. he will just get into an accident n then turned vegetable for the rest of his life suffering the pain!!! Im fucking serious!

Thats all for now... am really really tired and its 4am now! I will have a really long day n night to go tomolo.... Tilll then... will update next week i hope!!!