Saturday, December 04, 2010

List of things to do before 2011!

Here is a list of things i must do before 2011 comes... I suddenly feel super busy can?? And its less than a month before 2011 comes!!!


1) Gym every mon, wed and fri --- Me join gym already.. gotta have determination n even stronger will to go thin as Sue Ann's wedding is approaching fast!

2) Finish my 2nd year log book --- This, i think very unlikely to achieve cause its like super long n boring to do.. FML seriously...

3) Shop and buy things to prepare for Sue's Wedding --- I need to find Gold shoes to match with Turquoise colored cheongsam, A cardigan/jacket for at night wedding dinner to match with my Dark Grey silky type tube dress... But im still unsure what color jacket should i match it with.. and what color shoes should i match it with... Suggestions anyone?

4) Shop for Christmas gifts --- Supposedly look for a Christmas exchange present for my High School 10 years reunion coming on 18th Dec... with less than 20 people going... How pathetic.. somehow makes me re-consider to attend it... (Somehow if the organizers reads this, i appreciate what you all do ok.. im just ranting.. this is what i do, i rant in my blog).. I feel right, i dont know whats the point of going there lo... There are some friends n classmates whom i know n i like is organizing it, thats why im going.. Out of my respect to some of the organizers (that put so much effort in organizing it) thats y im going.. or else, i seriously dont bother... its like.. Over the 5 years in my that high school, i dont really talk to other class students.. Takan suddenly at 10 years reunion, we should start talking? That would be weird right? And im very sure its just entertaining talk (eng siu talk)... And i still remember, not many people like me in my high school days cause i have a lot of discipline problems... (u know, when u r in high school, good students will avoid n dislike students with discipline problems) hahahaha... Im still the same i guess.. cause there's still not many people liking me now too.. but not bcos of discipline problem.. I know its mainly because the way i talk, is too blunt and straight forward.. always tend to hurt people's feelings.. but what the hell.. the things i say is a fact.. cannot accept it.. Just dont talk to me la.. or pretend u cannot hear... (If i happen to hear things that i dont like to hear, i just act stupid n pretended that i did not hear; just to avoid arguments and confrontations)

5) Go to KL at least 2 more times --- One is for Sue's wedding... I super feel excited for her wedding cause her wedding is confirm wedding of the year man! And im putting her wedding as my first top priority, cause she has helped me alot in the past.. and the least i could do is help her back whenever she needed my help... Im the type that will always remember that person's good deed to me.. and i will repay back wan.. if u do bad deed to me, i will repay back too... Hehehe...

6) Finish up my 2010 work.. Office work la.. what else.. hopefully all done before Christmas!

7) Update my accounts n financial year of 2010 --- Yes, i do such things.. Just never mention cause i'll always remember to do it.. but this time, this month; seems like i got so many things to do that i need to jot it down in case i forget... (Never knew im this organised leh? hhahaha)

8) Go dye my hair... before the 18th.. (what color should i dye? Red or Ash Blonde?)

9) Manicure and pedicure by 18th...

10) Attend an event on the 10th of December!!! Muahahaha...

All personal grooming has to be done by 18th.. so im good to go for functions and events... Oh... so busy busy busy....

I cant wait for Christmas! I love Christmas!!! Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year everyone!! See you all next year!!!

Love ya!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

New Blogshop! Nouch Trend Online Boutique!

Hello guys,

Just a quick update here! My friend; more of new found good friend Sandra, just open her new blogshop selling wonderful pretty women clothings! And seriously, the quality that she sells are good stuff; excellent quality stuff.. not like those cheapo pre-order clothes that from the picture looks nice but when the real thing comes looks super turn off man...

Yes, the Online Boutique name is Nouch Trend... Pronounce it like 'Notch'... The meaning is kinda like 'Top Notch Trend'.. TNT will blow you up! *Hahahaha, i kinda just made that up!* *excuse the lameness*

As you all know, i have been addicted to online shopping lately and i have a good friend who just opened a new online boutique.. Confirm i support my friend more wan la..

Just so u know, she personally hand pick those clothings.. She goes to the wholesaler store and pick it out one by one.. So that the quality is of course confirm good... All her items are limited... Which means one specific design probably comes in 2 colors or max 5 colors... Very unlikely to find her stock having the same color and same design.. (of course unless specified)

She buys all stock in hand, so which means she has ready stock at her home.. If you want it, you pay it and then get the item the next day!... No need to wait like those pre-orders for almost a month! Usually i wait until 'no fire' for that clothes adi man... And if you are from Penang itself, u can self collect from her! Save on shipping fees!

Some of you might think the pricing is abittttttt more expensive than others that are selling online.. But u have to remember lo, her's are definitely good quality.. Confirm wont disappoint you! Somemore she personally hand pick wan... So the price is worth the quality..

Her Online Boutique tagline; "We Do Not Sell The Quality That We Do Not Want To Buy! i.e WE DON'T SELL WHAT WE WON'T BUY!"

She has good taste and everybody women out there of course wants to buy good quality affordable clothes.. Therefore, her clothes are all confirm lovable by you all la...

Please support support abit by clicking 'Like' at her Facebook Business Page

And also add her as friend in Facebook Profile Page

Since she has just started, For now she is selling women's clothing.. Later on will venture in selling bags and accessories...

She is a very hard working girl, i must say... She works full time helping her husband's business and then do this as part-time... Before she was married, she sell clothes before already.. but not on the internet, so now, she is trying to venture into this online business even though its so damn competitive.. Thats why she need support from her friends, like me! And i need your support to support her!


For your extra info, she even registered her company legitimately under The Companies Commission of Malaysia (Suruhanjaya Syarikat Malaysia or SSM)... This shows how serious she is in this business and confirm legitimate... Dont have to worry she is a conman la... Hahahahaha...

To show you some of the wonderful quality clothes she sells.. Here... here...

This Dress is only RM28 and comes with the green belt!

This one RM35 only!

This is a chiffon top that comes with the special necklace and its only RM30!

This top comes in 4 colors...Black, Blue, Pink and Red and its RM35

This long dress only RM38.. and you can glam it up with your own accessories..

The rest, im kinda lazy to write more cause its 6am already! OMG SO LATE!!! If you are interested just go to Nouch Trend Facebook Page ok! All complete info are there...






This long dress above is my favorite man! Looks super good for tall busty girls.. You can show your cleavage elegantly through this dress!

Oh, she takes her own photos and edited it herself.. cause she said; so that people can see it clearly on how the quality really looks like... Honest seller, i tell you!

If you wan to see more photos; Click here for their Opening Specials and here for their this week's New Arrivals

Thats all for now... Bye bye.. and yes, i will update about something else more interesting soon ok!

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Wow....

Wow.. i didnt realised that i have abandon and neglected my blog since June!

Fuhh!!

As i am in Penang, nothing much happening can be blog about man... the most i can do is usually talk about my boring mundane life in Penang... which doesnt interest most of u all... except for some few 'people'... Or like some stalkers!

What have i been doing since June till now? Nothing much... As usual, continue gaining weight, got more addicted to online shopping... But as of today, i vow to never buy anymore online clothes unless i go stick figure thin...

Then, spent my birthday with my bf... and only bf.. dont feel like celebrating with anyone else cause i dont have friends anymore... and old women, dont celebrate birthdays man!... Once u pass the 25 years old mark as a women, u dont celebrate birthdays anymore except with your the other half... or if u r a man!

All in all, i gain some new close gal friends since June... and realized a close friend being obviously two faced... And i miss my best friend more even though we no longer click like we used to... Met her again last week after like a month plus didnt see her... felt like i miss her alot.. but hard to find back the old feeling i used to have with her... as usual, when i saw her at the beginning, it feels kinda awkward... then it got better and comfortable in no time...

How do i start to miss her? Accidentally bump into her twice in a span of like 2 weeks? To me, it feels like a sign from God... Its like i should do something to save this friendship... But i dont know how... i really n seriously dont know how.. Its like we dont have much topic and in depth topic to talk about anymore... we only talk about surface stuff u know... So, i was thinking, i should just let time to decide... not meet her for awhile.. n maybe like half a year later or a year maybe, we might forget everything in the past and be close again?

But then God decides to take action n let us bump into each other twice! That seriously must mean something lo! But im a shit ass friend... i just dont know wat to do... Above all that, even though we dont talk as much...even though we dont seem to be like best friends anymore, She will always be my best friend in my heart... She will always be in a special place in my heart... its like she will always be that special someone to me in my heart for a long time... I know i sound gay.. but its true, so shut up...

Wat else am i going to do with my life for the rest of the year? Gonna celebrate my the other half's bday next week... My dieting start today, like seriously adi this time.. and if i dont go stick thin by next year or by the time i get married... i should really kill myself... Im so fat now that im hiding myself from friends that used to see me thin... I dont like to see the 'omg, u r so fat now' shocking look! Better hide myself... until i go thin enough n confident enough to face the world... Imagine la, even my parents also dont wan me to attend family functions cause they say its embarrassing for me n them that im so fat now... And i also dont wan to attend family functions la... U know all those aunties n uncles... same shit questions from chinese family/relatives all the time.. When u getting married la? why so fat? Dont la fat... and they can talk about my fats for like an hour plus n dont realised that im fucking pissed inside (i experienced it during chinese new eyar this year)... And if some of the people whom i know, saw me n say im not fat... I confirm know that person is a fake ass bitch! I will just give a fake smile.. and uhhh walk away...

Oh, and i bravely put on braces!! Like finally!!! Since im already ugly n fat... so i thought why not make myself uglier by putting on braces... Let all the ugliness come at once!! My braces need to be put on for like 2 and half year... need to extract 4 teeth.. But now, my braces is on for my top teeth first... And only with the top braces on, its already so hard for me to eat n chew... and since im no used to having braces, i seriously dont know where to place the braces... I usually just place them in between my lips so that i will feel comfortable (u know, metal keep on banging on the wall of the mouth feels damn uncomfotable ok!)... And i was imagining, if i have both top n bottom braces on, confirm so uncomfortable adi... dunno how to place them in my mouth!

Ok, enough blabbing... Gotta go... i will probably abandon this blog for a few months more... unless i have exciting news to share... which i doubt so...

Tata u stalkers!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

If only...

If Only............

I could change my past...
I could change the year 2001...
I could change the year 2005, specifically month of February...
I could change the month of October in 2009...
I had went to Australia and never come back to Malaysia...
I could change the stupid decisions i have made...
I could convince my the other half to move to other country... cause i hate my life in Penang... (Penang is generally a nice place for normal people.. but for me, i have nothing in Penang)

And most importantly, If Only I Could Have You... sigh...

Everybody has this saying that We cannot change our past but we could change the future... but what if the decision that we make to change our future will actually ruin our future?

There are many times i wish i could just let go everything im building with my the other half so that i fulfill my dreams of living abroad... but that would be a silly thing to do... cuz i will be all lonely n i know i will feel regretful cause i will lose someone this great... Is it worth it to lose genuine love, possibly of losing that only someone that would ever genuinely love you for who you are for the rest of your life, for something i selfishly love to do with my own life such as becoming a stewardess or living somewhere abroad and etc... and then end up being lonely...

Last but not least, this is the question i ask myself everyday...

Is this the life i want?

I dont even know myself...

All i know is that i have been feeling very sinful n regretful for the stupid decisions i have made in the past... I am never the type to really regret the things n decisions that i have done... but to date, i have deepest regrets on 2 things... And i still feel so bad...

Im so sorry... Just so you know, i love you deeply...

Could have been seeing u next month... sigh...

Coulda woulda shoulda...

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Hennessy Artistry @ QEII 2010

Damn... So cannot believe it that one year has passed...

And its Hennessy Artistry at QEII again in Penang...

Here is the thing... Hennessy Artistry Events are held 5 times a year... 4 times in KL and 1 time in Penang... So basically once a year in Penang only... And i went for Hennessy Artistry in Penang last year

And when i look back at last year's photos, damn... time flies... and many things has happened in this one year... groups that i mix with is also different already...

This time around, i invited my bf's friends to go along so that my bf wont be bored.. he doesnt like clubbing nor partying n noisy places... he prefer peace n quiet life... and as for me, i can actually count the times i go partying... My bf knows i love Hennessy Artistry so much that he only allows me to go to Hennessy Artistry Events... :) The last time i went out for the purpose of partying was Hennessy Artistry at The Opera but ended up didnt really party at all due to some mission i had to accomplish.. Now this time of QEII have to party all out! Hehehehee....

Ok pictures time...


Entrance!


Queue up and got tagged and party!


This is where u can mix ur own Hennessy and be creative!


Crowd of the night!

I came in late as i was waiting for bf to finish work... so i manage to take these photos of the performers...







4 gays of the night...


Groupies!


Girlies!


Me and Jen! Muacks!


U see, no free flow whole night... so we bought 3 bottles of Hennessy cause we couldnt get enough of it! >_<


Best Picture of the night! See... So much different from last year's group!

Monday, May 31, 2010

The hardship of being a parent...

Lately, i have been getting a little taste of how is it like being a parent... and the feeling sucks...

You see, i have a younger brother and a younger sister, which made me the eldest in the family... and being like 8 years and 11 years older than them... they are of course now at their teens and im like old... They have been giving me too much problem that seriously, i dont know how to help them anymore... All my parents know how to do is work... my mum's mind is always occupied with something else... My dad just basically doesnt care much about family matters... and both of my parents, they are the type that as long as there is no big problem like their stuffs got stolen, or house got burn, dont go disturb them...

With my bro n sis in their teenage years, they obviously have created so many drama n nonsense for me to handle them... and being an emotional me, i always go crazy when little stuff ticks me off... and hence, both my brother and sister regard me as the crazy elder sister... In fact, i think they hate me more n curse me more than my mum.. which it feels kinda hurt to be regarded like that.. but i think its worth it to be regarded like that if they turns out alright and i have done watever i could to stop them being rotten in the future...

When i was younger, i used to hate my parents so much till the extend that i actually curse them to die almost every single day for controlling me, taking my freedom away... going crazy on me.. and i was seriously not allowed to go out at all until like after form 5... i always blaming them n hate them for not understanding me... But now as i grew up, i understood why they did all those... if they had not, i would be a rotten piece of slut...

And now, i think my parents regretted being so hard on me that they gave so much freedom to my brother and sister which i think its too much... too much to an extend of like for exmaple, my sister got exam on coming monday, my mum will still allow my sister the go out the saturday before... like wtf...

Like only yesterday, i confronted my brother for doing something ridiculously stupid and i were to tell u all wat the heck is it u all will be like wtf???!!!! serious shit?? OMG!!! And please dont bother asking me.. i wont tell cause its an embarassing matter... too embarassing indeed that i wanna change my surname adi cause no one in the household bother to take any action on my bro.. Anyways, he was denying it... So, fine... to make a long story short, at the end when i was about to just let him go for awhile since he is going to have exam today... he go nasty and crazy on me... which i had to resort to whacking the hell out of him... And i think he dont feel any pain cause he is like 19 years old.. almost a grown man body n strength but with a 13 years old thinking... And yesterday was like the first time ever my bro got a beating from me ever since he was like 5? I was never the type of people who beat somebody up... and i know that cause my phone stealer friend tried to slap me also i didnt fight back... and also whenever my brother n sister did something wrong, i will always try to talk things out or just scold.. but yesterday, i had to beat him up cause he was being violent n disrespectful... And i seriously hate people disrepecting me when i give them my full respect in the first place...

After beating him up, i couldnt sleep... i had my mind on the incident the whole night yesterday until now... Yes, maybe i was being too harsh... but i also believe in respecting your elders... I even made my mum cried because i beat up my bro... sigh, my mum never change... She loves n spoil my bro as ever... and does my bro ever love my mum as much she loves him??? But regardless, she still loves him the most.. and its obvious... But anyways, i apologised to her today and bought her fav ice cream, green tea ice cream... yuck! But i made it clear to her that i apologised for making her cry but i dont apologise for beating up my bro cause he totally deserve it! If anyone of u know the real situation, everyone would agree.. he totally deserved it!

This incident made think the whole day... all the while i have been having very good relationships with my brother and sister... and bcos i had to occasionally take up the parent role when my mum couldnt do it.. they hate me, and this caused my relationship with my siblings turned sour...

Before my brother incident, it was my sister's problem... I couldnt sleep nor relax in peace each time i think of her and her problem... I kept of thinking of a solution on how to solve her nonsense... Which finally, i got a solution and that solution had made my relationship with my sister improved abit... When its starting to improve and when me n my sister are starting to talk again like when she was little up till like 3 years ago... My sister told me something about my brother which i had to take action and become the parent and being hated all over again.. but this time its my brother's turn! Sighh... luckily i dont have much siblings... Damn, have to note to self not to have so many children next time... 2 is more than enough...

I seriously hope that after getting all these curses from them... they hating me n etc... I would like to think that, at least i tried making them into a better person and tried stopping them from doing something that will ruin their future... i hope one day they will understand why i did all those.. why i went crazy on them, why i did this n that... Like how now i finally understood why my parents did all those to me and im seriously thankful for that... It maybe be tough and i was seriously hating them that time.. but now im really thankful that my parents was being hard on me...

See... im already sounding like an aunty... sigh... signs of getting old...

But seriously, its is seriously tough being a parent and also try to be the cool parent type...

Thursday, May 06, 2010

2nd Installment of Hennessy Artistry 2010

The second round of Hennessy Artistry of 2010!!!

HENNESSY ARTISTRY TURNS UP A NOTCH WITH TWO PARTIES IN PENANG & KL!!!

In May, there will be TWO Hennessy Artistry Party!!! One for people up north! And one for the central region people... Yupp and as always in Penang, the venue will be at QEII, Penang on May 27 and in KL will be at Zouk KL on May 29

The newly revamped Hennessy Mixing Zone is also set to return to allow fans to once again experience the Hennessy Digital Light Art FX booth, Hennessy Mix Master, and Hennessy Mixing Bar. But the highlight of it all, party goers will also again, be able to look forward to the delectable tastes of some of Hennessy VSOP’s signature long drinks – Hennessy Apple, Hennessy Ginger, Hennessy Berry and Hennessy Citrus.

And i still like ginger and citrus better!

So, who is going to perform at both places in the Hennessy Artistry Event?


Summer Daniels and DJ Tempo

Summer Daniels and DJ Tempo are actually two of four members from the electro house hip-hop quartet, a band name: Speaker Junkies. As a band, Speaker Junkies has opened for various acts such as LMFAO, Far East Movement, Sublime, Boomkat, and 2 Live Crew.

Having been heavily influenced by the entertainment scene from a very young age, 25 year-old Summer Daniels is not only a singer but also a model and actress. She recently transitioned from the studio and screen to take her rightful place on stage, microphone in hand, as the sexy front-woman of the band.

Partnering her on stage is fellow Speaker Junkies member and multi-talented Devon Duy Nguyen aka DJ Tempo. The singer, song writer, actor, producer, DJ, music composer and film composer was born in Minnesota and raised in Minneapolis, St. Paul. He has appeared in various major festivals and has played alongside renowned artistes such as Donald Gluade, Thomas Gold, Crystal Method, Felguk, Christopher Lawrence, and LA Riots.

Based in the US, Speaker Junkies has unleashed a new world of electronic music. Blending trance, house, break-beats, and electro into each single, their fresh new vibe is flawless and made especially for the electronic music lover.

Half of the band descends onto Hennessy Artistry with lead vocalist Summer Daniels and DJ Tempo, prepped and ready to unleash their infectious spine tingling tracks.


Joe Flizzow & Sona One

No stranger to the Malaysia music scene, Do you know that Joe Flizzow is actually one half of the internationally renowned Malaysian hip-hop duo, Too Phat?? As Too Phat, he released multi-platinum albums, sold over half a million records and even achieved international recognitions from MTV Asia and Channel V – incredible feats for a local artiste. He has also collaborated with various pop acts from Singapore, Thailand, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Australia, Canada and the United States. Among some of his standout credentials include performances for Linkin Park, the Black Eyed Peas, and Kanye Westhead-honco.

Now Joe Flizzow teams up with protégé Sona One for a ‘throw-your-hands-up-in-the-air’ hip-hop revolution. Promising an explosive, uncut rhyme style added with body-grooving vibes this performance is guaranteed to be something hip-hopper can salivate over.

Sona One’s repertoire is already an impressive list of artistic ventures on canvasses, walls and on stage holding a microphone. With the co-sign and backing of a regional hip-hop icon (Joe Flizzow), Sona One is well on his way to becoming one of Malaysia’s biggest superstars in the near future and he is only 21 years old!! Sona One officially signed with Kartel Records in August 2009. His debut album is expected to be released on the record label in 2010.


Ad Bangers

A combo of two top Malaysian DJ’s make their way into Hennessy Artistry in the second installment. Truly a force to be reckoned with, Ad Bangers is a duo that will bring the house down with attitude! The even fashionable DJ Blink teams up with Didjital (both of Lap Sap) for an idiosyncratic night of electro, hip-hop, house and a few mambo numbers that is sure the pump of the dance floor.

Blink, the hyperactive DJ, producer, promoter and designer, is constantly gorging on information, filing his head with as many bytes as possible. It’s a sound that’s reflected in the infectious upbeat mix of everything and anything that his wildly diverse sets have become unknown for.

Didjital brings to the table his unique style, and takes it on to another level with his versatile selection of music genres; ranging from bassline, fidget and hard electro house whilst mixing it up with his rhythmic scratching and tricks. He is constantly in tune with his crowd, firing spirits up to thrilling new heights.

Their aim: to connect people from the same industry, and integrating creative individuals from all walks of life into a quintessential world of turntablism, featuring a music mash-up ranging from House to HipHop to Mambo.

With more than just music reverberating through the club’s walls, Hennessy Artistry ‘The Global Art of Mixing’ is where music and cocktails find the perfect match. The blending of musical experiences provides the core essence, while Hennessy VSOP long drinks provide the evening’s inimitable spirit to complete the distinct ultimate clubbing experience.

Before i forget, here are some pictures i took frrom the first installment of Hennessy Artistry 2010 which happened on end of march in The Opera, KL...


Beginning of the night...


At the press conference..


See, benefits of being a blogger... i get to be this close to the artistes... this was taken during press conference before the whole event start...


This was taken when it was quite early... 10 plus pm i think... With mini acrobat show n all...


Then later on, there were too many people.. so they had to open that acrobat section to fill in more people... See the amount of people... So, pictures dont lie... Hennesst Artistry is indeed one of the most wanted, must have invitation to get into kind of party...

I had fun on my last Hennessy Artistry event... I get to see the awesome Shawn Lee performed and i get my phone back too... I even did a mini show for the public there to see how i got my phone back (pls note: it was embarassing n i didnt want to create a scene.. but i was kinda forced to)... It was indeed a very memorable event that i will remember for a very long time... I will remember her for a very long time..

I just thought about it... My friendship started with her (as in both of us started getting really close) during a Hennessy Artistry event 2 years ago... and now my friendship with her ended in a Hennessy Artitry event... How cliche...

Ok, so... pls... go visit the Hennessy Artistry website... and lurk around there everyday for the RSVP link to be open.. RSVP it and get invited to the awesome party of Hennessy Artistry...

Again, Main Rules and Regulations to get invited to the most awesome party in Malaysia from Hennessy Artistry...

Passes to H-Artistry ‘The Global Art of Mixing’ is by-invitation only. To obtain invitations to the party at QE II and Zouk logon to www.h-artistry.com.my. Alternatively, to relive the experience of past H-Artistry events or to receive updates on the upcoming party, visit the official Facebook fan page: www.h-artistry.com.my/facebook or follow H-Artistry on Twitter: www.h-artistry.com.my/twitter. The party is strictly opened to non-Muslim guests aged 21 years and above only. ID verifications will be carried out at the door.

To read how much fun i had last year when Hennessy Artistry had its second installment of the year 2009... Click link below...
Second Installment of Hennessy Artistry 2009!

Like OMG! So fast one year has pass already???? Things that had happen in this one year felt like 3 years of things happened man.... So many weird things have happened... and its unbelievable that all those things happen in one year... damnn...

Friday, March 26, 2010

This entry is to trash people! The Fakeness of people...

This is an entry about friendships, fake friendships and disappointment...

And im going to be totally straight forward here but without naming any names... if u think its you, then its u... cause its gonna be so straight forward that even a retard with down syndrome would know... I cannot handle anymore fakeness already... If i hurt your feelings here, Im sorry... You should know im being straight forward n honest here... Unless u rather me be fake, then i guess we r not suppose to be friends... I've lost of alot friends lately... got betrayed, got hurt... i dont mind losing a few more...

I used to have a friend (lets give her a name: Boobless)... which we met through a guy friend in KLCC and then we got closer in Hennessy Artistry event mid 2008... we got so close that we meet each other almost everyday... to the point that people actually mistaken us for lesbians... We went to every single event together in KL... I fetched her to everywhere we wanna go... I celebrated her birthday for her on year 2008 in advance in Pavillion... Bought her bday cake all by myself when no one wanted to even chip in for her birthday... On her real birthday, we went to Perhentian Island together... I treat her diving, transport and some meal... Most of the time when we go out, i treat her... (that is of course when i have extra cash, and i was single of course i got extra cash)... And come to think of it, it was kinda stupid of me to treat someone that nice whom i only know for half a year...

You will see Miss Boobless face on almost each of my blog entry in year 2008... when i read back on my blog entry how much i used to love her... it hurts so much... sigh...

Around Nov, i lost my handphone due to break-in to my car... Then on Dec 2008, I bought a new phone... The Sony Ericsson Xperia X1... My mum paid for me actually.. And she was really hesitant to buy such expensive for me cause u know parents... never agree in buying such expensive stuff...

On Mid Jan, I lost my Xperia... In Zouk.. and i did not blog about me losing my phone cause i didnt wan my mum to kill me that time... HOw did i lose it? I trusted that Boobless girl with my handphone and put it in her purse... I was busy smsing my bf but that time not yet bf... U know the courting period... of course a lot of sweet smses... When i lost my phone in Zouk, I went berzerk... I yelled, i cried, i throw tables... I cursed the mother fucker who stole my phone will die while shitting or even choke on rice n die... (unfortunately, the person did not.. But since now i know who did it, I hope next time when that person has a daughter, that person's daughter will be born retarded and got raped at the age of 4 repeatedly until the daughter dies... If has a son, the son will be erectile dysfunction and born retarded)... I totally trusted that person, thats y i left my phone on her hand.. I did not even suspect its Boobless... If i had suspected it was her at the first place i would have searched her body that time la... mother fucking bitch! My other friends who went with me to ZOuk that night, actually suspected its Boobless.. but i chose not to believe and i chose not to find out... Cause i had full faith in her... that i treated like my own sister... in fact, much nicer than my own sister and my own best friend... I totally didnt believe she would do that to me...

As for me, i got Rm3K more broke... As i did not wan my mum to know i lost the phone, i borrowed money from my best friend and buy the same shitty phone again... But this time is an AP phone... the first X1 was Ori... I took like 4 months to return the RM3K to my best friend with some help from my bf... So, i was freaking broke for 4 months...Imagine la, i lived in KL.. rental RM400 and plus utilities almost Rm600 all together... and i return my best friend rm500 every month and my salary after tax was rm1700... and i eat out every single day...

So last friday, i went to Hennessy Artistry... I finally want to know whether is it Boobless that did it because she has been bad mouthing me, betraying me behind my back, when i have done totally nothing to her... Examples: Things that i told her about another friend, i tell her not to tell... She went n tell that friend... (No, i did not gossip, it was pure fact anyways)... And i actually kinda purposely tell her those things, cause i wan to know whether she is the back stabbing bitch, back stabbibg me... when i know she really did tell, thats it la... I dont wan to be nice anymore... cause i freaking hate 'kiss n tell' people... I start on my mission to find out whether my lost phone is really on her hands... So i went to Hennessy Artistry last friday to find out...

And yupp, true enough... I compared the IMEI No. that i had from my X1 box to the IMEI No. from the phone.. it matches... When i knew it was her, i got so disappointed, sad.. n try not to believe it... When i confronted Boobless, she denied... She said... Same IMEI No. doesnt mean is your phone ok! Like WTF??? Cannot deny adi wat... She somemore said, its some guy name Jimmy that give it to her... and she told me "If u want, i ask Jimmy to come here la!" So i said... Ok, ask him to come here... i will wait! And at this point, she said "How to ask him to come, he's at overseas!" HAHAHAHAhahahahaa.... Fucking funny... This stupid reason reminds me of when i was in school, when my headmistress ask me to call my parents to school for disciplinary problems, i used to use this lame excuse to the headmistress... I have tried to take care of her pride by confronting her at the staircase where there's not much people around.. but when i walked off, she came after me (i was already at the entrance of first floor) n yelled at me saying she wants her phone back! Like wtf??? When i turned back to her, she kinda attacked me n slapped me... which she kinda missed a little cause she was shorter than i am... and she is a small size, that slap feels like nothing... I pushed her away leaning towards the wall...and told her... "there is no use for u to do this, im much stronger than u... what are you trying to do huh?" When i let go off her, she tries attacking again... funny man... a small size girl with a strength of a kitten trying to over power this huge me??? At this point, of course everyone there are looking at us... So, yeah... if u were to be at Hennessy Artistry at the Opera last friday, and u see 2 girls fighting on first floor, that would be me n Boobless... I even yelled to her... "You fucking phone stealer! Im not gonna giving you back the fucking phone! If u wan the phone back, u go report police and tell the police that i stole ur phone la!"...

I seriously regret until today that i did not hit her back that time... But i kinda know why i didnt that time... cause i knew if i were to hit her, she will confirm fall flat! I actually still cared how she would have felt..! WTF!!!!! Silly me!! Why am i so nice at the wrong fucking time????!!!

This lesson has really made me realize... Only RM3k can cause a friendship.. it does not matter how much i have done for that person... This incident seriously made me feel so scared to have close friends anymore... WHy people cannot be a little bit more genuine? Im not asking for 100% genuine cause i know, its impossible to be 100% genuine anymore... but at least, treat the person on the same level as how the person treats u.... Like when a person is nice n genuine to u at 60%, u could at least be at 50%... not at 10%! Is it that hard?? It gets so disappointing...

This makes me seriously feel to not wan have friends anymore... I rather be cooped up at home n be alone man!

BTW MISS BOOBLESS, IM STILL WAITING FOR YOUR JIMMY FRIEND TO COME PICK UP THE PHONE! BRING PROOF OF PURCHASE YA SINCE U SAY SAME IMEI NO. DOESNT MEAN YOU STOLE MY PHONE!

OK, I DECIDED TO BE A BITCH... MISS BOOBLESS IS ACTUALLY MISS STEPHANIE KOK YEN LING, THE PHONE STEALER THAT STAYS AT KEPONG, KL! STUDIES AT TARC IN KL... Nehh... short, boobless (totally no boobies... no even a small bump... only nipples!), small built, super long hair and always like to flip her hair around like she is so damn pretty like that... and a fucking phone stealer... and oh, she likes to find rich boyfriends to maintain her lifestyle... she only loves branded stuff... if you buy her branded stuff, she will fuck you adi... go ahead n try la, if u think she is pretty enough... Please go fuck her until she have aids or stds ok....

Lately, i have also been having problems with another friend of mine... Let call her Miss LongHair... I have been friends with LongHair for a very long time... someone whom i shared watever nonsense i have... i shared it all to her... but lately, it has been very hard... I dont know how to trust her... I dont know wat to believe in her anymore... I honestly feel, that watever i try to say or share, doesnt mean anything anymore... Cause somehow, the problem is with me.. i feel she will be lying or be fake again... I have put a wall on her... sometimes the wall gets thicker... sometimes it gets thinner... I just cant seem to totally remove that wall... We used to share similar thoughts... I have no walls on her... i talk watever shit i wan in front her... and she will still be listening n giving me advice that makes me think... damn, we r so alike... but now, when i tell her things... for example, my relationship stuff... about me quarreling with my bf... She will either vaguely answer me... Or like try to answer me things that she thinks i wan to hear... But when she answer me things that i dont like to hear, i put on a deaf ear to her... and this problem is getting serious... Its like, she give me the answer that i wan to hear also die for her (cause i will think she is starting to act fake again)... And to be honest, i think i know her well enough to differentiate whether her answer is really from her opinion or something that i wan to hear... and if she gives me her real opinion also die for her (cause when i hear something i dont like, i put on a deaf ear)... For example; when she said my bf is being freako, possesive n etc.. I dont like to hear it... cause my thinking is... my bf is like bcos he doesnt wan me to fall back into my old reckless life...and he is afraid of losing me to that kind of life... And bcos of wat i did to him in the beginning of our relationship, thats why he is still having trouble trusting me... So, at times when i argue with my bf regarding trust issues, i will talk to Miss LongHair about it and she will say things that i wan to hear n things that wouldnt offend me... I dunno how to explain la... Miss LongHair will understand this...

This is because our thinking is no longer the same... I think i am moving forward to a stable, wan kid, family, husband life... she is still into single life... this is where we are different...

Whatever that she is doing to her life... destroying her life as i see it... As how she sees my life as pityful... I used to not agree wat she is doing to her life... As i seriously love her too much that i dont want her to go tru the nonsense i went tru before i found this bf of mine / cum husband :D .... But i come to agree with my ownself that... She will not listen... like how i used to not listen when people give me good advise... I need to see the black hole... jump into that big black hole then only will believe its a big black hole... this is how normal human actually are... gatai... must go bang the wall then only will believe the wall is hard... So now, our conversations are not longer in depth.. in details... we only talk very surface stuff... like her daily life, her work and my daily boring life... We are so not the same anymore... And it seriously hurts me that we r turning into this... I think this problem is very hard to solve.. as i got my own issues to solve... My own issues as in... I cannot help myself but to start thinking each time she say something, i will start to think... is she being genuine or is she saying this bcos this is wat she thinks i wan to hear? So yeah, this problem lies in me... Not her fault actually... But sometimes u see, i known her for so many years, i can differentiate whether she is being genuine or not... when i sense fakeness again, my wall to her turn thick... And im the type that likes to act stupid... I did not say it, doesnt mean i dont know anything... I just keep it to myself until the right time to tell... or maybe i wont even tell... I will just go disappointed n my wall just gonna turn thicker... Last friday, we talk things out through the phone... and im glad everything came out... My wall towards her turn thin... in fact, much thinner compare to way before... (but of course, there are still somethings that are not quite out yet, i will talk to Miss LongHair about it when i see her next time...) I really seriously wan our friendship to work the way it was before... I wan to hold no barrier when talking to u n u hold no barrier when talking to me... (ok, im writing this as if its for her cause i know she reads my blog).... I dont wanna care wat u r doing now with ur life is right or wrong anymore... I just wan our friendship back to the way it was... I know it maybe hard for now... And im pretty sure in the future, we could be like the way it was before... (as in when we both have family of our own) then we will be on the same track again... ... I wan to be there for you when u have problems... like before... I wan sincere, genuine friendship... No fakeness anymore.... You should know how much i cannot stand people being fake... you should know how many people have betrayed me when i have done nothing wrong to them... I even have cried for stupid friends that steal my shoes when i was in college... and cried bcos of that boobless phone stealer bitch...
And you my dear, i have cried so many times bcos of you... not only recently... but way before when u did disappoint me at some occasions... but u didnt know... i just cried silently because of u.. for so many times over n over...

I dont wan to feel like an immature young high school girl that cries for friendship... i feel lame ok... Sometimes, adults are like kids... im so old adi, but i sometimes forget that im an adult... i think of stupid stuff n worry over little stupid stuff like a kid... sighh....

I hope by now, u will have not much hard feelings... remember i told u on the phone, i promise to try to open up as much as possible... this is my first step of trying...

***Actually this entry, i was thinking of writing about at least 4 different people... but its 6.15am now! so i chose 2 people to write about... one is to trash Miss Boobless... one is to open up to Miss LongHair... thats y my first paragraph of this entry is irrelevant adi... :)***

***** UPDATE: Miss Boobless blocked her blog after reading this entry of mine... See, really guilty people does that.... *****

Wanna see how pretty the Boobless phone stealer looks like?

Facebook
Plurk
Blog ----> since she blocked her blog, u cant see anything...

***** Another update: She totally close down her facebook n her blog adi... Nothing to see adi... :( Did she die or something? Hahahahahahahahahaaaa.... she should...! *****

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Hennessy Artistry 2010

First installment of Hennessy Artistry 2010 is coming up real soon!

19th March 2010



This year... things are gonna be much more fun.. more activites... more involvement... More involvement means more different zones in the party itself!
In other words, new concept in partyingggg.... Yay!

Setting the tone for the party at Opera is the Hennessy Mixing Zone which gets a facelift and will feature four new and improved zones – the Hennessy Mix Master, Hennessy Mixing Bar, the Hennessy Digital Light Art Effects, and a Hennessy Live Twitting Zone.

So, most of you all gonna ask... What are those huh?

Those who have been to Hennessy Artistry party before, they will definitely know what is Hennessy Mixing Bar...

Hennessy Mixing Bar is of course the place where they mix Hennessy VSOP with other stuff.. The usual signature Hennessy Apple and Hennessy Ginger cocktails will still be around of course (btw, my fav is ginger).. But there will be new fresh flavours!!! Featuring two brand new long drinks: Hennessy Citrus and Hennessy Berry!! I gotta try it man... I wonder why am i getting all so excited about this huh... :D :D :D

Hennessy Mix Master - For those who have always wanted to be a DJ, the ‘Hennessy Mix Master’ would be the perfect platform to do so. Here, fans would be guided by a professional DJ which will be helping them uncover their hidden talents and creativity in music producing. Their tracks will then be uploaded onto the official Hennessy Artistry website (www.h-artistry.com.my) where organizers will then select the top 20 tunes and reward the winners with a bottle of Hennessy VSOP each. The producer of the top-ranked track will also be walking away with an iPod Touch. Winners will be notified within 3 weeks after the event.

Hennessy Digital Light Art Effects - On the 19th march 2010 Hennessy Artistry party in The Opera, You guys will get to see the introduction of the ‘Hennessy Digital Light Art Effects’. In this area, people would be able to express their creativity and discover their artistic side as they create and design their own Hennessy VSOP desktop wallpapers using light technology and video projections. ^__^ I think my darling will be good at this...! But im not the artsy type... So, urrmmm.........

Hennessy Live Twitting Zone - Is of course for Twitter fans... People who likes to twitter all the time... The party at Opera will for the first time feature the ‘Hennessy Live Twitting Zone’!! Here, Twitterers would be able to update their status which will then be broadcasted live throughout the whole event! So, those who didnt get to go... Gonna be so green with envy when they read how much fun we are r going to have...!

On the music front, the first H-Artistry instalment of 2010 will feature an outstanding line-up of musical talents from Malaysia and Japan.

From Japan..... Toko based DJ Sarasa a.k.a Silverboombox...will bring the house down with her blend of highly-energetic Hip Hop, Funk, Disco, Soul, Breakbeats and House music.. And so you know, she could break dance while DJ-ing..

Our very own Malaysian - Bunkface, u know those guys that sings Silly Lilly?? Which that song was number 1 on Hitz.FM’s Malaysian Top Ten for 8 weeks and number 1 on Fly.fm’s Campur Chart for 10 weeks. Bunkface started to get known when they won first place for the Battle of the Bands competition in UNISEL organized by ROTTW on march 2006. Bunkface’s popularity soared even higher when their latest single, ‘Through My Window’ was released recently with the song garnering more than 3.7 million online mentions.

DVJ G Mix, one of the few individuals in the country with the ability to ‘visualize sounds’ and to provide audiences with hypnotic, head-turning visuals. He has performed as the closing act for the Bangkok Invaders and most memorably, as the guest DVJ at Korean superstar Rain’s concert VIP after party in Kuala Lumpur.

Last but not least, Shawn Lee.. Yupp, the First Malaysian Beatbox Champion... I heard he is so good that he represented Malaysia at the Beatbox Battle World Championship in Berlin and was ranked number 9 in the competition out of 45 contestants from 40 countries last year!

Have i excite you yet?? I think is enough for you all to quickly get ur ass up... and ask for invites from your power friends that has invites or go to Hennessy Artistry website and RSVP for ur invitation asap!

I will definitely be there... So, get on it now...

I have been like at least 6 or 7 (kinda lost count) Hennessy Artistry events since 2008... and trust me, Hennessy Artistry party gets better n better every year man!


This Picture was taken at Hennessy Artistry July 2009 in Bukit Kiara Equestrian Park where Fatman Scoop performed... *look at the amount of people man!*


Me with my then best girl friends.. :D

Wanna read about my past experiences in Hennessy Artistry party??
Click here
Year 2008
Year 2009

My most memorable Hennessy Artistry event was when Flo Rida was here... on July 2008... Best of the best... cause i had so many friends, different groups ofr friends went.. Totally enjoyed the the crowd.. And i was mad happily tipsy... Those who went with me will know.... So everytime i hear Flo Rida's.. "Apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur... Low Low Low Low..." It so reminds me of Hennessy Artistry and the so much fun i had! Ish... Missing the good old times... Im getting old.... Sigh...

Ok, i feel like im starting to rant nonsense adi... So yeah... gotta go.. see u all soon!!

But remember....

Passes to H-Artistry ‘The Global Art of Mixing’ at The Opera, Sunway Pyramid is by-invitation only. To obtain invitations to the March 19 event, logon to www.h-artistry.com.my. Alternatively, to know more about past events or to receive updates on the upcoming party, visit the official Facebook fan page: www.h-artistry.com.my/facebook or follow H-Artistry on Tweeter: www.h-artistry.com.my/twitter. The party is strictly opened to non-Muslim guests aged 21 years and above only. ID verifications will be carried out at the door.

Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Settling Down??

As everybody knows... Im settling down... My life now is all about my bf... Every single day is all about him...

But i cannot help but wonder... What does settling down really means?

I know my boundaries here... I live a life like a married woman.. wherever that i wan to go, i need to ask permission from my the other half.. whatever that i need to do, i need to inform him first... But does it include being always alone.. caged down...?

I used to go out alot.. going out parties n events.. every single weekends... When i was in KL, if there's an event, u'll see me there... Now, i dont even bother about events, not excited about it at all... But there are many times, i longed to go partying... just once in a while... I believe it will do no harm right? But the process on getting my immigration officer approve it gets tiring... I hate the feeling that when i nicely ask for permission to go out clubbing, with my bf along... he will start to insult, shoot me of my past life... give me many nonsense so that i end up not going... My applications always get denied... But i still suck it up n end up listening to him... But there are sometimes, he cannot feel my pain inside... All i wanted was to go out crazying, just once in a blue moon... Im not asking every weekend! Every since i came back from KL for good last July, i have never touch alcohol for the purpose of fun n get drunk.. I never go to clubs since then.. NOt even once! What i do everyday in Penang is Monday till Saturday.. my bf works.. full day... when he work, im alone... i do nothing.. i either go to work or sleep at home.. watch dvds, wait for him to finish work.. And when saturdays come, i hate to go to the malls alone.. cause everyone will be couply or with someone... but im alone... The most looked forward day of the week is sunday.. when he doesnt work.. I get to spend my whole day with him.. And his mood is usually good from Saturday night till sunday... Cause he dont have to work.. so his mood is exceptionally nice... During working days, his mood are seriously like a stick got stuck up in his ass.. sour, angry or tired...

There are times, when i feel really lonely... i think to myself.. Is this worth it?? Doing all this for him.. is it worth it? All i do everyday is nothing... i wait for him to finish work n my life revolve around him... Its so much about him that it worries me.. Is this right? Is this worth it? And usually, i tell myself its worth it cause there's this something inside me tells me that i will never be able find someone like him anymore.. no doubt he's not that good looking, not tall, not rich, has this crazy temper like me once in a while... but i feel that he is the most honest man i have ever met... He gives me security... He gives me this feeling that he will never betray me.. He is loyal... He loves me so very much and its worth it for me to give all my loyalty to him...

But at the same time, i've lost so much... I lost touch with all my friends... i lost many friends... i lost my own faith... lost confidence... Its like without him, i dont know wat to do anymore... i got too dependent on him... It also scares me that im settling down so fast... There are times, i even ask myself... If this is the life i want? Is this kind of life enough for me? Dont get me wrong, i dont wanna go back partying n do more nonsense anymore.. Its just that I cannot help but wonder... Is there more out there? For example, when the weather is so freaking hot these past few days.. I was thinking.. am i meant to be here, stuck in Malaysia for the rest of my life? Where else, 5 years ago, i dreamt of new life in Australia... having 4 seasons weather for the rest of my life, making five figure income with my degree... And five years ago, never in a million years i would want to settle down like this... boring n mundane... Yes, in total honest... as much as i love my bf so much... my life is seriously boring n mundane... But what kept me going on is that... I keep on thinking to myself... My bf is worth it.. This is how normal people settle down.. Worth it to be boring... dedicate everything i do n share everything i do with my the other half.. prepare n learn how to start a family... If i still continue partying n go crazy every weekends like every other people do... No guys would ever treat me seriously... who would wan a party girl to be their wife???

There are some friends of mine, they say they pity my life... They feel that im missing so much in life... Doing nothing n wasting my life on someone controlling as him... To my friends, he is controlling...

Yes, he may be over controlling at times.. but i see it as prevention of any possible future nonsense to happen.. U know, those cheating n nonsense shit (and you guys know, how complicated can a relationship get these days)... And i personally, really feel i am not missing much in life.. I believe i have play, partied, done and tried many things that other people have not... I am satisfied with my life.. i have done n tried so many things that i dont think i am wasting my life away.. Im old, I need to retire from the partying wild life... I wan to start a family... I wan to get married n have baby... this is my new goal.. this is what i have not done... And i seriously envy people with family.. Everytime i see a family of three, a couple and one young baby looking all happily like that, i envy them.. I wan to be like them...

But when i see my other friends my age or older than me goes out partying every weekend, i dont feel a bit envy... I have done those and feeling superb boring with those adi... And when they give me the pity look, i actually kinda pity them in return... I dont know why i feel that... I know people have their own reasons why at this stage, they still party n go crazy.. but dont they think they are abit too old to compete with 16 years old girls to like 22 year olds? There are some girls... over 30.. mid 30s and still act like as if they are 21 or 24 like that.. i feel sad n pity those kind of girls... I dont wanna be those aunties trying to be young.. i wan to act my own age... And at my age, im suppose to be settling down... But i dont know why, there are times, i feel doubtful.. I feel scared at the thought of settling down... Am i not ready? Am i being kiasu? Maybe there's more to life than this? Maybe i am meant for something else? Maybe this is not me? Ok, this is me.. U see, those are the questions i ask myself when i feel doubtful.. when i start to get lonely n think nonsense again.. And when my bf is being superb nice, spends all his time with me... laugh n joke with me... Show his love n care for me (which i only get that on sundays).. gives me his full attention, i feel so happy... and i feel so sure he's the one... and i know for sure i wan him to be my husband... Sigh...I dont know... I dont know why i am feeling like this... Maybe got too much free time on my hands...

So, whats the real definition of settling down huh? Am i on the right path?

Monday, March 01, 2010

Neyo - Never Knew I Needed

This song sincerely represents my current relationship... and i love this song so much! Definitely will be one of my wedding songs! :D

For the way you changed my plans
For being the perfect distraction
For the way you took the idea that I have
Of everything that I wanted to have
And made me see there was something missing (oh yeah)

For the ending of my first begin
(Ooh yeah yeah)(ooh yeah yeah)
And for the rare and unexpected friend
(Ooh yeah yeah)(ooh yeah yeah)
For the way you're something that I never choose
But at the same time something I don't wanna lose
And never wanna be without ever again (oh oh)

You're the best thing I Never Knew I Needed
So when you were here I had no idea
You're the best thing I never knew I needed
So now it's so clear I need you here always

My accidental happily (ever after oh oh oh)
The way you smile and how you comfort me (with your laughter)
I must admit you were not a part of my book
But now if you open it up and take a look
You're the beginning and the end of every chapter (oh oh)

You're the best thing I never knew I needed (oh)
So when you were here I had no idea
You're the best thing I never knew I needed (that I needed)
So now it's so clear I need you here always

Who'd knew that I'd be here (who'd knew that I'd be here oh oh)
So unexpectedly (so unexpectedly oh oh)
Undeniably happy (hey)
Said with you right here, right here next to me (oh)
Girl you're the...

You're the best thing I never knew I needed (said I needed oh oh)
So when you were here I had no idea
You're the best thing I never knew I needed (needed oh)
So now it's so clear I need you here always
Baby baby
Now it's so clear I need you here always

Thursday, January 07, 2010

My 2009... And hello 2010...

Its the new year.. How have I been in 2009? Gosh, I cannot believe how fast time has fly past me...

I started the year 2009 in a rather peaceful way... Did my count down for 2009 in my hotel room in Bangkok alone.. Wishing secretly that I'd find my love n fall in love with someone who will really appreciate me, really love me, will never use me, will not take me for granted.. And on mid Jan, I started to get closer to an old friend of mine.. Well not really old but I've known him for 2 years.. And we became an item not long after.. And of course we r still together up till now.. Now, I have moved in with him... He treats me as his wife and I see him to be my potential husband..

Then, nothing special happen to me along the way... I was starting to get bored about partying life, clubbing n events.. I got more attached to my bf and things at work in KL got worse as I was quite unhappy with my working environment as I have some tight, green people in my ex company that I'm not happy with.. My thinking is.. If u r not happy about something, do something about it.. So I resigned and came back to Penang for good... Its about the right time for me anyways, long distance relationship getting sick for me.. So if I wanted my relationship this time to really work, I gotta do something about it.. So I left all my so called happening life in kl for someone I believe its worth it for.. I came back to Penang for good on end of July.. My life in Penang was good at the beginning.. I celebrated my birthday on August with 3 other closest people in my life.. That is my boy friend, my best friend, my boyfriend's best friend whom was my best friends's boy friend too.. That time, I felt like I'm the happiest and most hang fuk person on earth.. I had best friend n a boy friend who loves me to death.. I moved in with my bf on mid Aug, I think... Then my life is the same everyday in Penang... Slowly, I started to get emo n down on end of sept till early nov as I was constantly alone.. My bf is always busy working.. I'm always alone feeling so lonely.. And started to miss my KL life alot.. And begin to wonder is this all worth it??

I started a new job but in the same position and same job scope on the first monday of Oct.. Hate my job as usual.. But I have be in this line for the sake of my parents.. I love my boss and my flexibility... So nothing to complain la.., I plan to stick in this company like forever.. Muahaaha... Ok, about the lonely part, I brushed it aside after huge fight with my bf and tell him all my problems and he tried to do his best to make me feel not alone.. Despite the fact that he was fucking busy with his new company.. He was really busy setting up the new company.. My life is the same ol same ol.. Until Dec.. Yupp, which was just last month.. Many things have happened.. Then on Mid Dec, I found out something which turned my life around... I was secretly wishing it would happen but it happened at the wrong time.. Inconvenient to mention it but lets just put it this way, this thing will haunt me forever n make an impression on me forever... Huge decision to make about that.. But the decision that I could finally make was end of dec.. Which was a total wrong decision which I regretted till this day and will regret forever.. I tell myself and swore to myself.. If this happens again, I will not make the wrong decision ever again... I will stand firm on my decision and carry it on.. After I made that stupid decision which I will regret for the rest of my life, I turned into depression mode.. I looked ok on the outside but I was crushed all inside.. I hated everybody that influenced me to make that decision.. But I can blame no one but myself cause I was not firm enough...

I celebrated new year's eve by just cooking at home for jen n her bf, my bf and my bf's parents.. Jen and I cooked spaghetti, mashed potatoes, broccoli and ham backe, and buttered mushroom.. We did our count down at home at my bf's attic floor over looking the Batu Ferringhi seaview.. Peaceful, quiet, without jam and sweaty people...

On Jan 1st, my emotions came all out.. Crying like crap over my lost n the stupid decision that I made.. Told my bf that I had enough of everything, I seriously hated everyone that gave me that stupid solution.. My parents were part of it.. So I hated them as well... Still don't feel like talking to them cause they asked me to do it and now they never care enough to bother calling me to see how am I doing.. I even wanted to break up with my bf n just wanna go disappear to some place that no one knows me.. This was how down I felt.. I felt like ending my life was just the only option.. But the weird thing is, I woke up the next day feeling different... Something inside me tells me to think of this problem I had in a different way... Try to over look it.. Focus on something more positive.. And tell myself that this is me.. It is something that I couldn't see before that's y I was so depressed.. I've been trying to feel positive about it since then.. But occasionally, I still feel abit down n depressed over my lost.. But sigh, wats been done, has been done... No more turning back.. *ok, this paragraph, u guys don't have to understand it, its only for my reference*

So, this is my year.. Calm most of the time.. Try to be domesticated.. Stayed at home most of the time, be with my bf cum future husband everyday.. Do things for him n his family.. Trying to train myself into wife material.. Occasional emo n lonely moments n etc.. Cannot blame me for being emo la my dear.. My year 2008 was all about partying, outgoing life.. And yeah, hell lots of flings n stupidity.. And suddenly my life had changed to calm, quiet, peaceful just for u.. And I finally understood many things because of you...

Yes, my life is all about my bf.. Like I said, my blog will evolve as I evolve..

I wonder how will my 2010 be?? What's in store for me this year? I don't have a resolution this year.. But I'm not afraid to say this.. I'm hoping I'll get married this year.. My bf says if he can manage financially, he will wan to make me his wife.. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed.. I'm gonna try to be a good girl n good gf to him... Hehehee... Let me put a disclaimer here.. I'm not desperate to get married ok! Its just that I find that love happens in a very magical way... I never believe those saying that 'when u see that someone, u will know immediately that he's the one'.. But oddly enough, when I see this bf of mine.. I have this very very strong feeling n its telling me that he's the one.. And its worth it to do so much n sacrifice so much for him.. I hope we can make it this time.. Yes, I know its very sickening to read so many stuff about my bf.. But trust me, if u really found the one, u will truly understand how I feel.. I used to be the 'wtf, so fucking gay, no such thing as the one, love is bullshit' kind of girl.. And I read from somewhere that not everybody can find their soulmate.. And I think I'm lucky as I think I've found my soulmate.. :D

Anyways, I'll see wats in store for me this year.. Finger crossed for everything to be fine, smooth n calm.. Till then.. Muacksss!